Hermiting and Faith: Journeys...
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I must remember to start slow, to focus on one thing at a time. I think the first thing I need to do is organize my bedroom, so that I can create my prayer-space... a "shrine", if you will. And then I can spend time there every morning and evening, in God's presence, praying and listening and worshipping as necessary for the revitalisation of my soul.
I will continue to work on my Celtic knots and spirals. I think I will avoid attempting the animals and people and other types of artwork that the ancient Celts drew, because I so appreciate the simplicity of the unadorned knotwork - the plain work that is complicated and beautiful and consuming. I understand why the monks drew such progressively complicated, tiny designs on the manuscripts they decorated; it wasn't so much a contest amongst them (whoever could do the most complicated work was lauded) but a challenge to see how intricate a design an individual could create. That is the push for me as I draw more and more of these pieces of art.
I will focus on the writing of prayer and liturgy in the Celtic tradition. I found some information on liturgy, and I have samples of prayers. I need to research prayers more before I feel confident in writing my own, but I know I am capable.
I will also begin working on music in the Scottish Celtic style. I found information on that, as well. I even found a web site about playing guitar in the Celtic style, and some directions for making your own penny whistle and uilleann pipes! (Uilleann pipes being the Irish version of the Scottish bagpigpe.)
I will read the Word daily. I have devotionals and can do this as part of my morning prayer time for now. Once I have written prayers for liturgy (Morning Prayer and Evening Prayer), and taken up a list of readings to use for each, I will add daily study of Scripture into my day at some other point, perhaps at lunch time.
I will focus on these things for now. I cannot even begin to think of joining any lay order until I am able to follow these minimum requirements for membership in any order, for all lay orders require the observance of Daily Offices (typically Morning and Evening Prayer) and daily time with God's Word, as a discipline.
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Lay orders also typically require three vows, of poverty, chastity/purity, and obedience.
Poverty is sometimes expected to entail the rejection of all worldly possessions, but is often defined as the rejection of any possessions that are not necessary to one's life, vocation, and/or work. So I may keep my guinea pigs, my computer, and probably my TV, but ought to get rid of the microwave and dishwasher. (As an example.) I may keep the car, as I need it for my work. Etc. This I need to think about and discern prior to taking such a vow. Is it possible for one such as myself, who seems incapable of properly managing her money, to truly live a life of poverty? I may find myself *in* poverty, as a matter of course, due to mismanagement of funds, but that is not what the vow means. So it requires much thought and prayer.
Chastity/purity may cause me some problems at first. I need to tame my tongue and my mind. I have not been completely chaste thus far, but it is easier to be chaste while completely single. Purity is another matter altogether. It is difficult to be pure. Note that if I marry, I do not have to remain chaste; sex is to be enjoyed, but only within the confines of marriage. This is different for lay orders, for in a lay order one is not a nun or a monk, though addressed as a Sister or a Brother. A nun or a monk can never marry and must remain celibate, while a member of a lay order may marry and have children, but must remain celibate prior to marriage and keep the marriage bed pure (sex with spouse only).
Obedience, I hope, won't be as difficult as the other two. I long to follow God completely, to know His will and complete it without faltering! I have difficulty discerning His voice at times, which is where this is hard. But I hope that, with the introduction and faithful following of the disciplines of daily prayer and study, I will learn to hear His voice constantly and know His will intrinsically.
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Tonight, I will do my devotions and follow my personal evening prayer pamphlet. Tomorrow morning, I will follow my personal morning prayer pamphlet, and I will begin organizing my bedroom so that I can create my "shrine" - my altar and place of prayer, study, and worship.
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Peace & Blessings to all who read this. I feel closer to finding my path now than I have in a long time. Thank you for sharing with me in this journey towards my self, my spirit, and my God.
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The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with us all, evermore.
Go in peace, to love and serve the Lord.
Thanks be to God.
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