| jagwizkid wrote (in blue): I was hoping I could get some opinions or thoughts from some people WITH ADD on something that people (non-ADDers that is) have been telling me lately. I have been hearing that I should just "quit confessing ADD" or that I should be praying for healing for it to be healed. K, so what, exactly, does "confessing ADD" mean? It's not a phrase I'm familiar with (of course, I'm Evangelical Anglican, so that could affect such things). I have a problem with that. Hey, so do I (even without knowing what the one phrase means)! Then again, I'd have a problem with it even if I *didn't* have ADD, just like I have a problem with people who say such thing about other diagnoses (like autism, Down Syndrome, etc.). I guess I feel like its like telling someone "you think red is the best color, you need to quit confessing red, you need to pray for healing that you will know that blue is the best color." Which is completely warped, of course. To me, ADD is the way the brain is wired, not a defect. I can't imagine NOT having ADD. Me, neither. It's like... you grow up this way, so you don't know anything different. I don't know that I'd be able to function if my ADD were suddenly gone. I take Concerta each morning, but it's not like that makes everything disappear... I still have plenty of symptoms - they're just *less*. Wouldn't the world be a boring place? I happen to like thinking out of the box, marching to a different drummer, and having my own little world! *nodnod* I like being different. I do actually like having "brain farts" and going off on tangents. It truly is what makes the world go 'round! Yes ADD has its challenges, but doesn't being short have challenges? You wouldn't tell a short person to quit confessing being short and that they should pray that God would heal their stature. Exactly. The challenges I have that meds *don't* help with centre around perfectionism and procrastination. I want desperately to have a tidy home, but due to perfectionism and procrastination, it just doesn't seem to ever reach completion (that and distractability). The meds do help me be on time for work in the morning, which is a great thing! I think God wired me like this for a reason and that He can use me WITH it. I *like* all the advantages that come with ADD. I think God can help me through the challenges. Am I wrong here? Is ADD something we should all be praying for healing for? I know they mean well, but....anyway, sorry for rambling a bit, but I would love to have some other input and other thoughts on it! Well, you know... The attitude you're talking about here is basically why I haven't told a lot of my RL friends about my diagnosis (which was made in February of this year). In our circle, there are a few other people who have ADD (who have known since they were small), and the complaints people make are tiring and discouraging. They also make me more anxious about getting things done right and so on (I have anxiety issues due to ADD but they are lessening thanks to treatment). Even before I was diagnosed, I was probably one of the most understanding of ADD issues in this group of people. I expect it has something to do with the fact that I work with autistic children *and* recognized my ADD symptoms for what they were a couple of years ago. The complaints I hear about these people have to do with them 'flaking out' on a responsibility, making promises they later realized they couldn't keep, and other such things. My favourite has to do with whether or not the person is on his/her meds. Oh, and leave us not forget the old adage, "He uses his ADD as an excuse." Well, I have always worked hard and obviously managed quite well to appear as normal and successful as I do - very much in spite of my ADD, since it went undiagnosed (and, hence, untreated) until I was 28 years old. My family was not upset when I told them, but I haven't told aunts/uncles/cousins yet. My best friend wasn't shocked when I told her, and the other friends that I have told didn't even bat an eye. But these people have always been accepting of others' differences, and have known about my particular issues for years, so really all the diagnosis does for them (and for me) is put a name to this "entity" that has been blocking me in some areas of my life. (I said in my disclosure e-mail to my parents and brothers, "Do note that nothing has changed - I am still me. There's just a label for what makes me who I am.") ADD isn't an excuse for me to get away with slacking off. I am anything *but* a slacker! Anyone who looks at my list of achievements (well, my resume) will be able to see that! I have two undergraduate degrees (one in music, one in psychology). I also have my Royal Conservatory Grade 2 Theory and Grade 10 Clarinet. I'm working towards becoming a published author. I've been working with autistic kidlets for five years, and I relate well to most of the kids I meet in this capacity. I am also the Secretary for the Steering Committee of the local Teens Encounter Christ community, and maintain records and send out minutes. I also serve on two sub-committees for TEC, do a lot of music-related tasks for TEC, and have a couple of personal projects on the go that are specifically for TEC. I also work the weekends as much as I possibly can. I want to go back to school, but I know that I will need some accommodations if I am to achieve as much as I know I am able. I want to get my M.Ed. in Special Education and then I want to: teach a course on autism at the University level, run an autism treatment clinic, maybe teach in a school, and definitely open a special school that I've been dreaming of for three or four years now. But I am wary of disclosing my diagnosis, partly because of my list of accomplisments and partly because of the accusations that will come on the heels of said disclosure. First there's the look of complete and utter disbelief, because I am so much more responsible than the other ADDers we know. (Never mind that I'm also three or four years older than the oldest of these people. Never mind that there are different types of ADD, and these others all seem to have the hyperactive type, while I'm more inattentive type.) After that comes judgment. Every time I'm late for an event, or forget to do something, or do a less-than-perfect job at something, I will be accused of using my ADD as an excuse, even though I would *never* blame my ADD for any of these failings. (As in, I wouldn't ever say, "Sorry I'm late, but, well, you know... I have ADD." I *would* say, "I know I'm late - got distracted on the way out the door.") I think I'm probably one of the very very few people in the world who would not be surprised if she had an autistic (or ADD or whatever) child. I think I'm also probably one of the very very few people in the world who would not be devastated by said diagnosis. I don't know if that's because of my ADD or because of my work experiences, but I know it's true. I don't think praying for healing makes a whole heckuvalot of sense. God made me with the brain wiring that I have, and while He could certainly change it if He wanted to, I'm pretty certain that such an act would also change who I am as a person. I wouldn't be *me* anymore. Back a while ago, I discovered that my first and middle names put together mean, "God's Flourishing Graceful Warrior". I take that as important - vital, really - to my understanding of who I am in Christ and what I am called to do with my life. First, I belong to God. I am His. I am precious to Him, and He will look after me throughout my life. Second, I am flourishing. I may not always *feel* flourishing, but I am growing and I am learning (spiritually). It's just slow. Third, I am graceful. Klutziness of the Year Award notwithstanding. I have grace. It's not physical grace, but spiritual grace, internal grace. Grace under pressure. Grace that was given at the cross is the kind of grace that I have to give to the world. Finally, I am a warrior. I fight for what I believe in. I defend people, causes, whatever happens to strike me as vital at the time. Because I am God's warrior, I need to make sure that I am fighting for what He would have me fight for. And He has called me to specific battles in my life. Because I have been given grace, I must remember to offer grace to others. And because I am flourishing, I must take care to tend my spirit - so that I may continue to grow and bear fruit. Sorry, that was a tangent. If anyone wants me to give them a name like the above, post your first name and any middle names you have, and I'll give it to you! I've "done names" for several of my friends - it's a challenging & tricky thing at times, but a lot of fun and usually pretty uplifting in the end! I better go do the dishes... -Janna -- Another random thought from my random brain... Brought to you by the colour green, the number 7, and the letters J, L, and H. http://geocities.com/janna_louise Guinea pigs have ADD. "Nobody realizes that some people expend tremendous energy merely to be normal." - Albert Camus "Home is not a place. It is wherever your passion takes you." - President John Sheridan, Babylon 5 (Objects At Rest, Production #522) "If you don't like the way the world is, you change it. You have an obligation to change it. You just do it one step at a time. You really can change the world if you care enough." - Marian Wright Edelman Psalm 42:7 |
And the response I've had so far?
| Do you think you could have written such a cogent, literate treatise on ADD if you weren't one of them? The whole reason you have this compassion and communication ability is because, thankfully, God didn't make a mistake! |
I guess I *do* have communication ability.
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