Identity: Who Am I?

I have been feeling an urge lately to come back and write about identity again. So I have gone through my past writing on the topic and I took notes and we'll see where I end up going with this.

Twenty years ago, when I was first (and finally) diagnosed with ADHD, I said in an e-mail to my immediate family that the diagnosis doesn't change anything about me, it just explains part of what makes me who I am. ADHD is a pervasive thing. It affects how I perceive and respond to the world around me, so it affects every part of my life. Finding ways to understand myself in light of this was incredibly helpful.

But it's not my identity.

At least, it's not all of it.

I think humans in general have lost track of what identity is, and that makes it really hard for us to actually know who we are. Not only that, there's confusion about how fluid or concrete our identity really is. A lot of society's problems can, I suspect, be boiled down to this.

When I'm developing a character in my fiction, I look for a name that reflects their planned role in the story. I figure out their appearance, I like to know what their favourite flavour of ice cream is and what kind of music they like to listen to, but what really helps me understand my characters is just dropping them into different situations and seeing what they do. Why? Because how someone responds to a situation shows you who they are.

This makes me wonder: should identity be about the labels we apply to ourselves? Should it hinge on the roles we play in society? Or should it be based on our humanity and how we choose to behave?

More and more, I'm leaning towards the latter.

All humans are created by God and worthy of respect and dignity because of that. At the same time, all humans are fallen and continue to fall into temptation and sin, which separates us from God and conveys on us a stark debt: our very lives. Humans are not gods and never will be gods or angels. Humans were created in God's image, made to live in communion with Him. But we fell for lies about who and what we are, and that has led to all manner of confusion. It led to Jesus's life and death and resurrection and ascension. We can have new life in Christ if we accept the Truth of the gospel and recognize our identity as God's beloved creation, turn away from our sin and towards the Truth of Jesus, and do our best to stay on that narrow road.

So who am I?

I'm Janna, God's Flourishing Graceful Warrior. I'm a human being, created by God and worthy of respect and dignity. I'm a beloved daughter of God because I have accepted Jesus as my Saviour. I do my best to treat other humans with respect and dignity, because they are also created by God and worthy of respect and dignity.

Oh, you meant what roles do I play?

Well, I'm a wife and a mother, and I try to take care of our home. I write fiction and I occasionally wax philosophical about Christian theology. I try to be a good communicator of love, truth, and life; I'm a storyteller, and I love honesty, openness, depth, and clarity.

Other stuff that matters to me? I have a degree in composition and I'm a clarinetist who also loves to sing. I really like guinea pigs and butterflies. My favourite colour is green. I'm Canadian. I have ADHD.

Does any of that tell you who I am? Does it let you drop me into convenient boxes so you know where I fall on different axes (political, oppression, etc.)? How accurate do you think those boxes are going to be?

Peace & Blessings.