If you know me at all, you know I have ADHD. I also have been diagnosed with depression. I take medication for both of these conditions.
ADHD is highly heritable, meaning that there's a really strong genetic component. And ADHD varies wildly in how it affects people, both in general and from one moment to the next. Some of us (with the right supports in place) are able to function in the world practically the same as anyone else, while some of us (even with lots of supports) just can't seem to get it together. ADHD is a disability.
Depression can have some genetic contributions, particularly with chronic clinical depression (which means it's not based on life circumstances). Most people are able to function decently if their depression is treated adequately, but it still is very disabling in many ways.
Disability is not a bad word. We are not "differently abled"; there are literally parts of us that simply do not work properly and make it difficult or impossible for us to do stuff the way other people do. And that has absolutely nothing to do with our worth as human beings.
God made us all, and He loves us, and we matter because of that. All humans, regardless of disability, are worthy of love and of being treated with respect, because we are all created by God.
But I don't think that disability is necessarily part of His plan for us.
Here's what I mean by that.
I think that disability is a result of the brokenness of this world. I don't think that God's actual intention has ever been for His creation to be disabled. I think that happened after the Fall, because of humanity's tendency to put ourselves ahead of God.
I have long said that I wouldn't want to be cured of my ADHD because I don't know who I would be without it. It has been part of how I experience, process, and interact with the world for my entire life, so it has shaped everything about me.
And I stand by that. I'm way too old, at this point, to feel like I would be able to adapt to suddenly not having any disabilities in this life.
But that's this life.
In eternity, things will be different.
In the new heaven and the new earth, I will have a new body, and it will all work perfectly. My brain will function correctly. I won't need glasses anymore. My knees won't hurt, I won't pick at my own skin, I won't get headaches and I won't be allergic to green growing things. That sounds fantastic, to be honest.
But I don't have that right now. Right now, I struggle with my mood and with executive functioning, and physically I am falling apart. Right now, I am doing my best with what I have, working out my faith as best I can and listening to God so that I can Become that which I was created to be.
So remember that verse in Romans that gets trotted out all the time, about how all things work together for the good of those who love God (Romans 8.28)? That doesn't mean that everything is awesome all the time, it means that even when bad things happen to us, God can (and will, if we let Him) use those bad things to help us in some way.
When I think about the stories in the Bible about people who were disabled in some way, the common thread throughout is that they usually get healed. There are a couple of reasons people get healed. One, they are healed because of their faith or the faith of someone asking on their behalf. Two, they are healed so that God may be glorified--often this healing brings them to faith because it is the sign they needed that God is who He says He is. Some people don't get healed, and those people are cared for by others, valued and appreciated because they are people (e.g., Jonathan's crippled son is taken in by David and cared for as one of his own). Paul writes of his "thorn" that causes him grief on the daily, and he says that God is using it to teach him to depend on God, for "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness." (2 Corinthians 12.1-10)
All of this tells me that disability is not of God, but that He uses disability in our lives, to either teach us something or to teach others something. It also reinforces to me that (1) disability is not necessarily a punishment for sin even though it is a consequence of this broken world, and (2) being disabled is not in itself a moral failing, and it does not detract from my value as a human being. I am still God's creation, and He still loves me, and that is truly beautiful. And because I am a Christian, I am also God's child, and that makes it even better.
So when I'm struggling, which I do all the time, I need to turn to God. He is my help, my salvation, my comfort. He will provide what I need, but I do need to depend on Him and trust Him, and then I need to accept His gifts.
I will continue to take medication, because if my body isn't producing enough serotonin or dopamine, it's fine to use store-bought; God gave us science and blessed scientists with the knowledge and ability to create the medications, after all!
I have not studied this topic in-depth as yet, but I was recently watching a video on YouTube where someone mentioned that there are people who think they'll be disabled in heaven, and that got me thinking. So now, finally, after over a week, I've managed to write this post.
I hope I'm clear, and I hope this makes sense.
Peace & Blessings.
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